Levels of Orchid Addiction

Levels of Orchid Addiction, published by www.orchidmagic.com, 2004. By Valerie Allgrove, all rights retained.

Levels of Orchid Addiction

Level 1 (1-5 plants)
Spray bottle to mist plants (leaves and roots only)
Tray filled with gravel (cheap ceramic or glass lasagna/brownie pans from the job lot are great. Do not use metal, it will rust)
Basic Orchids growing book

Level 2 (5-20 plants)
Water sprayer from the fancy gardening store
Trays filled with expensive tumbled river stones
Expensive, hardcover orchid basics books
Tabletop fountain
Warning signs of growing addiction: Bookmarking orchid websites.
Buying every sort of blooming plant that Home-Depot, the Grocery Store, etc may have.
Going to a local orchid show

Level 3 (20+ plants)
Additional spray bottles, carefully labeled, with rubbing alcohol in one, a vegetable oil/liquid soap/water mix in the other to combat bugs.
Plastic jug for mixing fertilizer
Plant racks to maximize vertical plant space.
A first plant light
A small, moving fan
Guide to orchids, perhaps even an encyclopedia of orchids book
Mini Greenhouse from the fancy gardening store
Warning signs of growing addiction: Framed orchid prints on the wall
Orchid notecards
Joining an orchid society

Level 4 (50+ plants)
Watering hose attached to an indoor faucet so water can be carefully adjusted for temperature before watering.
Saving rainwater in jugs for certain species
A bigger plant light, with a timer
Bigger plant racks, with drip trays so the dining room floors aren't destroyed
Books on certain types of species
Pronouncing orchid names correctly, and correcting others
Warning signs of growing addiction: Referring to local plants, formerly known as Pink Ladyslippers, only as Cyprepedium acuale
Joining a second orchid society
Visiting greenhouses of friends made through the orchid societies

Level 5 (100+ plants)
Getting rid of "pedestrian type" orchids AKA no-name hybrids
Beginning to specialize in certain types
Taking over a room or porch in the house, and dedicating it to growing orchids
Warning signs of growing addiction: Travelling with other orchid society members to larger orchid shows
Making travel plans to include visits to nearby large gardens with specialized orchid collections
Making travel plans to include buying sprees at major or specialized orchid rangers

Level 6 (immaterial how many plants are actually owned)
Giving talks to local Garden Clubs on orchids
Making travel plans focussed on seeing private orchid collections
Making travel plans focussed on hunting native orchids
Writing stories about orchids!